There's a hacker going around DA guys. (UPDATE)

3 min read

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This hacker has been going around making a name for himself on the site. He'll hack into your account, but lay low for at least a week. You never even know he's there until you start seeing pictures of Thomas the Tank Engine saved onto your sta.sh. This will continue for a little while until a journal with the title "It's Too Late" is posted on your profile. The journal will be nothing but the lyrics to "Hungry Like The Wolf" by Duran Duran. Then he will change your password and begin sending notes to your watchers asking them for sexual favors in return for stock in Slim Jims. He will post poorly drawn My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic fan art on your profile, most of which involve Pinkie Pie reciting passages from The Old Testament while wearing various outfits from 1970's Sears catalogs. After five days time he will delete at least 4 of your watchers randomly and tag every single person that YOU watch in almost every post.  Then he will begin to write disturbing letters about President Obama in your journal along with screen-caps from those really weird RockAuto.com commercials. Finally after enough time has passed he will delete all of your content, hack into your bank account, force you to buy a 7-year premium membership, change your username to a variation of OHMYGODLOOKATTHOSESHOESTHEONESWITHELACE, and then post 37 pictures of his oddly misshapen nipples on your account.  

Post this in your journal to let your watchers know that you haven't been hacked and warn them about this rampant hacker! Stand up and fight! Don't let yourself become his latest victim!

Congratulations, if you took this seriously then you fell for a huge joke, cause-
Shashamon 32 minutes ago  Uh, I wouldn't be too afraid of this guy if I where you. Because I made this as a parody of the hacker paranoia that runs rampant on this site. I didn't even make it as a practical joke, I thought that people would see how silly it was and get a good laugh out of it. I in no way meant for this to be taken seriously, and I'm really sorry if I caused any fear. Though I do find it ironic that it ended up becoming the very thing that it was made to parody. I did not mean for it to take on a life of it's own. I am sending this to everyone that posted this in their journal before this thing grows out of hand.
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